Mel, United Kingdom
2020, the middle of the pandemic, I felt all was not well in my body. Long COVID was being talked about in the press. After an X ray and a blood test, my doctor called. ‘There’s a mass on your left lung’. A mass? What? I’m 52, no history of smoking. I do yoga. I’m a vegetarian for goodness sake. What do you mean? It turns out that lung cancer is increasing in younger people, particularly women and people of South Asian descent and those without a history of smoking. I felt as if a meteorite had landed in my garden. I was at the bottom of a crater. Distraught. Terrified. Out of my mind and body.
Treatment during the pandemic was an other-worldly experience. My partner, Sarah couldn’t accompany me to hospital. Not for surgery, not for chemotherapy, not for radiotherapy. I somehow detached from my body, my mind, my spirit stayed outside the hospital building. I felt utterly alone. The isolation was in many ways worse than the diagnosis and treatment.
I am now Stage 4 and living, truly living with cancer. I have shifted into the cancerverse, found community and connection. I write, I advocate and I share my story so that others perhaps can feel less isolation, more hope. I find joy every day, every where! I’m lucky as the drug I’m on, a targeted therapy, means I have few side-effects. I live with va-va-voom! I proposed to Sarah in 2025, I have grandchildren. I cycled in Sir Chris Hoy’s Tour de 4 to raise awareness that people with Stage 4 cancer can do incredible things if we’re well enough.
As a woman in a same sex relationship I have felt seen, acknowledged and supported. This is not always people’s experience. I speak to charities about representation of marginalised groups. We need to see ourselves mirrored in hospital and charity literature. All humans deserve the best care.
If you’re facing cancer, know that it takes time to process. There are dark days, hard days, confusing days. Find a team you trust, get a second opinion if you feel you need more reassurance. Find your cancer co-pilot. Mine is Sarah. For some it’s a friend. A sibling. A parent.
Cancer research has come on in leaps and bounds. There is hope. And we need it. Hope is our rocket fuel. You can follow my story on Instagram @mylovelylungs