Patrik, Sweden

Kidney Cancer

I’m a 54-year-old proud father of three, living in Kalmar in southern Sweden. Cancer has been a part of my life’s shadow for a long time. When I was 17, my mother died from kidney cancer. The year before, I lost my father in a car accident. Those experiences shaped me—but I never believed cancer would one day find me too.

On February 1st, 2023, while driving to work, I was struck by a sudden kidney stone attack. At the hospital, scans revealed a massive tumor in my right kidney—15 cm and weighing 1.5 kg. The diagnosis hit like a lightning bolt. I underwent open surgery, and fortunately, the operation was successful.

But nothing could prepare me for the psychological aftermath: the fear, the existential anxiety, the confrontation with my own mortality. That part was tougher than the physical healing.

Thankfully, I’m a former ice hockey player and professional floorball athlete. I’ve built mental resilience the hard way. That stubborn strength—what we call “pannben” in Swedish—has helped me face the reality of living with cancer, and the possibility of an early death. Ironically, it has also brought me closer to life, to the present moment, and to everything that truly matters.

To process it all, I wrote a song. I composed the music and used AI to help bring my voice to life. The result was more powerful than I ever imagined. When I play it loud, it heals me—from the inside out. And now, I’d love to share it with you.

🎵 Listen here on Spotify or Youtube
Artist: Patrik Lönell

Song titel: Its when I fight You that I heal

With hope, strength, and music, Patrik Lönell