Srinivasa, India

I am a doctor. The earliest symptoms of colon cancer was pain in the abdomen, irregular bowel habits. As a doctor, I suspected that this could be due to something going wrong. So I did the stool test for occult blood. It came positive, Soon I had a colonoscopy which confirmed the diagnosis. At the time of diagnosis, i was having both national and international assaignments. For example I was travelling monthly for weeklong work with the Bhopal population and providing mental health care. At the international level I was working with professionals and by travel visits in Somalia, Iran and Afghanistan. With the diagnosis all my professional activities came to a temporary halt for about an year. I recall sharing with my wife, on knowing the diagnosis, ' Life as we know is over, but we will rebuild a new life!'.

As a doctor, many of the challenges of the treatment was not a challenge. The biggest challenge was chemotherapy. The days of hospital visits, the side effects and the sense of total helplessness for a few days following each session of chemotherapy. Even after 13 years, I still carry the side effects of chemotherapy in the form of peripheral neuropathy. One symptom I recall during chemotherapy is the emotional lability. Also half-way into the 6 month chemotherapy, I developed herp[es infection(trigeminal nerve area) and this pushed my hopelessness further. At the time of diagnosis I was obese and had neglected my physical health for many many years. I suddenly became aware of the need to make lifestyle changes like daily exercise, changes in food intake, regular sleep. Further, I also became aware of the uncertainties of future life, which led me to reexamine my spiritual roots. Since it is only my wife and me in the family, our vulnerabilities also occupied my mind. My fear of recurrence led my to maintain the chemo-port for the next 5 years, which meant hospital visits for flushing the port every 6 weeks.

My wife's support was central to my recovery. The other important source of support was relatives, friends, and colleagues. One of the first things we did consciously, soon after the diagnosis, was to share the information with all our contacts. We did not hide the news. This was the best thing we did. Physical, emotional and spiritual support reached in large amounts and this made the pain and losses less. The other change was in my lifestyle towards positive habits like daily exercise, regular and adequate sleep, healthy food intake and being connected with family and friends. Reaching out to make sense of the illness and uncertainities of life, help me to grow spiritually.

Both because I am a doctor and I had good insurance cover there were no negative experiences. The treating team was extremely supportive and made the pain of illness and treatment minimal. One of the actions I took was to start a support group for others living with cancer and bring my professional skills of mental health to the benefit of other cancer survivors.

Cancer diagnosis and treatment is unlike any other life event. Life as one knows, prior to the diagnosis, changes in many ways. For example, 5 years earlier to my cancer diagnosis I was diagnosed to have diabetes and this brought in my life very few changes. Cancer diagnosis was a different cup of tea!! As an individual, each of us have the choice to respond to it positively or negatively. Specifically, use the illness as a springboard to reassess the goals of life, relationships and more importantly find a meaning of the illness, suffering within the context of your spiritual roots. Looking back, I can certainly say that I became a better person as a result of the diagnosis of cancer and the uncertainties that go with the diagnosis. Specifically, I am less self-centered, more tolerant and find fulfillment from what I can do rather than what I desire. I can certainly say that I am richer physically, emotionally and spiritually as a result of cancer diagnosis and treatment.